I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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