i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
