So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Randomize