He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
