I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Ladies don't puke and tell
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
