i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
