Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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