just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
