And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.