you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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