I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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