Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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