well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize