The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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