I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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