Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
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I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
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I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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