margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
