those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
