guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Found the puke drawer
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
