So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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