On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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