Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
