i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
