apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
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"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
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It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
My vagina is very pro this idea
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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