these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
