I love black thongs
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
