He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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