My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
