If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
