Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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