Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
