The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
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