Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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