wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
