Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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