Small penises have feelings too.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
