i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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