He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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