I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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