So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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