what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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