So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
