Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
its liver damage thursday
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize