everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
