question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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