i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
