Jerry, you need to find god
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
