She said her name was "party"
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
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is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
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Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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