Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
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The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
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I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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