so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
